Hi, I'm Shelby! Welcome to KEPT: Unveiling the shrouded battles of a life with Bipolar Disorder. KEPT is a journey. It is a mission. It is soul-baring. It is terrifying. It is thrilling. It is going to hurt. My dearest wish is to see compassion in people's eyes, in their words, and in their actions. My goal is to create a community of strength and support for people that are battling this illness. I would very much like for the loved ones of a person with BPD to gain some insight into what those battles might look like.
People suffering from mental illness keep their battles a secret. They closely guard the challenges, the terror, the hopelessness, the triumphs, the rollercoaster theme park of treatment, the reasons for failure and success in their life. Why? To bare your soul to someone is dangerous. It can mean relapse. It can mean losing yet another relationship. A job. A promotion. Loss of respect. And in reality, even IF you choose to bare PIECES of your soul to someone you think you can trust, they don't REALLY understand what it all means. And frankly, it feels like people forget you are fighting to survive, to breathe. So we shroud battle after battle. And we fight to breathe alone. And we hope that continuing treatment will mean we survive it all.
I say we shroud our battles because when you drop a veil or a curtain over an object, you can't see the details of that object. But you know that object is in the room. You know the outlines of that object. You also know that if you walk into that shrouded object, you will get hurt. If you have a loved one with mental illness, you see the outlines. You know it is there. And from time to time, you get hurt. I want to unveil my battles so that fewer people see only the outlines and fewer people get hurt.
My story, my battles, are not what you will see in every single person that has BPD. Every person with this illness has experiences that are unique to their situation, but we all share common symptoms in varying degrees. Please do not attach my specific experiences to a loved one or coworker, because assuming these things does them and you a disservice. They could have very different things that are a part of their illness. That being said, it doesn't usually take me long to spot someone with these tendencies or struggles. You know a piece of fruit when you see it. You might be looking at a Papaya for the first time, but you know that Papaya is a piece of fruit!
My faith plays a huge role in my life and in my success with each battle I face. I will be talking about it at different points because I firmly believe God has given me the tools I need to get through this. He is good ALL THE TIME, regardless of the circumstances of my life. His nature is not dependent on my experiences or situation. To share this very personal part of my life requires I share how my faith affects my illness. Also, I do not know everything clinically there is to know about BPD. I do know what I experience and I do know my struggles. These are the things I will be sharing and discussing.
Thanks for joining me on this journey!
People suffering from mental illness keep their battles a secret. They closely guard the challenges, the terror, the hopelessness, the triumphs, the rollercoaster theme park of treatment, the reasons for failure and success in their life. Why? To bare your soul to someone is dangerous. It can mean relapse. It can mean losing yet another relationship. A job. A promotion. Loss of respect. And in reality, even IF you choose to bare PIECES of your soul to someone you think you can trust, they don't REALLY understand what it all means. And frankly, it feels like people forget you are fighting to survive, to breathe. So we shroud battle after battle. And we fight to breathe alone. And we hope that continuing treatment will mean we survive it all.
I say we shroud our battles because when you drop a veil or a curtain over an object, you can't see the details of that object. But you know that object is in the room. You know the outlines of that object. You also know that if you walk into that shrouded object, you will get hurt. If you have a loved one with mental illness, you see the outlines. You know it is there. And from time to time, you get hurt. I want to unveil my battles so that fewer people see only the outlines and fewer people get hurt.
My story, my battles, are not what you will see in every single person that has BPD. Every person with this illness has experiences that are unique to their situation, but we all share common symptoms in varying degrees. Please do not attach my specific experiences to a loved one or coworker, because assuming these things does them and you a disservice. They could have very different things that are a part of their illness. That being said, it doesn't usually take me long to spot someone with these tendencies or struggles. You know a piece of fruit when you see it. You might be looking at a Papaya for the first time, but you know that Papaya is a piece of fruit!
My faith plays a huge role in my life and in my success with each battle I face. I will be talking about it at different points because I firmly believe God has given me the tools I need to get through this. He is good ALL THE TIME, regardless of the circumstances of my life. His nature is not dependent on my experiences or situation. To share this very personal part of my life requires I share how my faith affects my illness. Also, I do not know everything clinically there is to know about BPD. I do know what I experience and I do know my struggles. These are the things I will be sharing and discussing.
Thanks for joining me on this journey!